Men Vs Women! where the hell is it going?

          They seem to be at war with each other! Why? From where are, this negative vibes, coming? where are they leading to this discussion? Can they really do well without each others?
I don't know exactly why, all of sudden, these kind of talks get prominence,,,,but I guess we can take its track from the past where there were hardly any women in the developing countries who had got her own recognition with her own name. Either she was someone's daughter or someone's wife and lately, someone's mother. Though all of the above were respected posts at that time :-D but unlike men, they never got their own recognition as an individual. Now, you can really not count few exceptions because they will be always there,  in every case, however, we are talking about the majority of women community.

 Everything was good and smooth until few among them raise their voice against the pre established system. That was not against men really but, now women also want their recognition as an individual. She also want to share the power, position and even property.  Now, I think, nothing is wrong in it because it is a sign of a healthy and progressive society! Isn't it?

So? why is this a problem now? Answer is, the turbulence in a pre established system. giving up the privileges, sharing the major chunk......etc.
On the other hand, women don't want to take house hold responsibility solely, anymore but she don't want to give up her privileges also.
Guys! This is not about men or women but entire human race is a bit selfish :-D It wants everything good for the itself, at first! Socialisation is not a natural thing for human but it has been introduced to live in harmony. Division of labour was the requirement of the time. In ancient time, due to lack of resources and development, practically it was impossible for a man to handle outside and the home at the same time and so was the case with women. So, with mutual consent, they had divided the works between them to establish the family system. It was a very practical and realistic solution at that time because life was not so easy( physically) like today. Practically, house hold works a long with children were assigned to the women and collection of the livelihood a long with livestock went to men. System was practical, good and smooth so it worked really well! Everyone got used to it  and in the course of time, the rules became stricter. Earlier it was by choice but then it became mandatory for men and women to be in their restricted territories! Was is domination of male or lack of freedom, but, lately women developed a sense of inferiority. They thought, they are inferior to male so the division of labour converted into serving. Now, they serve their men and most of the works were obligations for her. It was occasionally suffocating for her but she was bearing with it to support the patriarchal system and sometimes due to fear as male members were physically more powerful.



   Time changes and its human nature that it can't take forceful rules. Human are freedom loving by nature and somehow the rules got biased for the women. With the development of technology, the house hold works and outer works become, physically, easier. Now, there were more of the mental works then the physical labor, unlike earlier. Women got the chance to step out of their houses and got the chances to see the outer world. They had started their education followed with jobs. Exposure to the outer world made her freedom loving like men. Now women also want to take education and work. They want their independence and no longer the obligations of house hold works. Due to past, they, sometimes, think revengefully about their male counter part. After getting her self dependence in terms of economy, she wants a redistribution of works unlike the previously established system, because, now the conditions are entirely different from the past. Now, both are supposed to work for the livelihood i.e. man and woman. So, the children and the house hold works are the responsibilities of both. No one should expect from women to work solely at home and at outer world ( office or her work place).
 Seems fair? But, it is not that simple from the psychological point of view,,,,,,,because, here, everything is changing for women positively i.e. self empowerment and less chunk of works at home ( which is demand of the time) but, for men, the work load has been increased! Previously, they only supposed to earn the livelihood but now, when they come back to home, they are suppose to share the house hold works also with their spouse. Now, here, arises the tension between the two. Men had seen their mothers and grand mothers only to work at home and not their fathers and grand fathers. Later, in the Patriarchal system, the house hold works were considered as an inferior works which should be done by women only! If a man was trying to help her women then other men used to make fun of that. They taunted him that he was acting like a woman (an inferior one between the two) !? Isn't it ridiculous? But true!
Now, major chunk of men of this era, also keep such mentality. consciously or subconsciously, it is in their mind that house hold works along with children and elders are only the responsibility of women! In the contrast, women do expect their men to share the burden! The very foundation of the war between the two, arises from here so the root is definitely very deep because it will be difficult for men to leave their past culture and women will also not ready to remain at home for the purpose or working at outside and solely at home...... the consequence is an unending war between the two which results into a broken family or relationship. When you tame a grudge against someone, the small, little things become larger! If the foundation of a relation is not based on mutual understanding, the ego takes its prominence in the relationship.

     What we can do is,,,,,let's start a fresh. Young generations are the saplings for the society. If you will turn back again and again to see the past, society will never progress. Our ancestors had their own reasons to make that system! There was nothing right or wrong in that  but that was demand of the time. World was simpler, life was simpler! But, You need to understand that the system of that time is no more relevant for today because of the changing life style! We extracts some valuable, relevant things from the past and then, can, make our own present. The concept of family is that valuable extract, in my opinion! We can't do without the family as an institution,,,even today! None of us wants to be alone! We all want someone who should be there for us in all the ups and downs of  life. I am not judging any one, but, being gay or lesbian, is also not  solution for the majority of us, as we want our own progenies to run our family, which is, again, not possible without the combination of the two. Almighty has created both to complement each others! So, please, make your peace with each others, be reasonable in your demands, develop a mutual understanding, share the burden and help in building the foundation of a healthy society, for both! You both are two wheels of a cycle called life, so, really can't do without each other. Let blossom the rosses of your hearts and enjoy the cosequent eternal fragrance... <3 + <3  Cheers and stay blessed!  :-D

Be a self motivated person! Think tank z on...

   Because, it really works wonder i.e. self motivation! You knows yourself better than anyone else, you knows your weakness and strength. You know what you actually want from your life so, yes, its you and only you who can motivate yourself for the long run (Y)
  Many times, it happens that we hear about someone or came across some incidents which inspires us to achieve something significant in our life,,,,,but in the course of time, we realise that they fades quickly, because those were temporary, event generated motivations which were not meant for us. For example- infatuations sound like love of life at the beginning but after certain time, we realise that that was not even love but an attraction. Yeah, its difficult to delineate the difference between love and infatuations at that time because symptoms are almost same in both the cases so it requires time and a bit of analysis to make a decision. Likewise, It takes some time to differentiate between temporary motivation and the permanent one.

Permanent one will stay with you, it will nag you time and again, no matters how much comfortable are you with your current situation. There will be a guilt feeling inside you that you are not doing what are you meant to be. The strong feelings of finding the meaning of your life in your own eyes.
   In this situation, give yourself a sufficient amount of time for analysis and you can consider this phase as a retreating phase for your soul searching. The best aspect of not doing something for a while is, you analyse honestly about yourself and not because you have to analyse. Without any compulsion, you take a better decision, informed decision about yourself. Put yourself under the critical microscope of your mind, take a visual litmus tests of your acts, summarise your life history, calculate the prose and cones........and the amalgam of the above will produce a real result because, its a real and diligent work of your think tank for you.

  So ? now what? what are you going to do about it? Should you again and again analyse the outcome?
Answer is, yes! Analyse yourself as long as it takes, think about the every aspects, reshuffle the plan, if required......but, but , but! when decided never look back for evaluations! Stick with the plan and act accordingly to achieve your goal of life!
If, at every step you will look back, you are never going to reach your destination and believe me, you really don't want this but its the laziness of your mind which force you to look back again and again. We want to achieve something but we want our comfort also and the struggle will be unyielding.
So, once realises the goal of your life, never turn back! Try hard, work diligently and look forward to achieve your goal which will automatically yeild the satisfaction and meaning of your life and why not! After all it was your self motivation which bring you here for the purpose. Cheers ! :-)

Why do we need women's day? Think tank z on...

       Hey Ladies! HAPPY WOMAN'S DAY!
                                                                         Ohhh! I have just realised that I am too humanist to address just women even on our special day. But I have not allocated this day for women? why shall I? I shall never be so miser to allocate just one day for women out of 365 days? Every day is women's day and men's day and the day of every creatures on the earth! As a strong woman from inside, it hurts my sentiment to allocate any particular day for us. I have not heard about Men's day? then why do we need Women's day? Are we not equal? Do we not complement each other? May be, I am in denial,,,,but I am sorry that I can't see any hierarchy! I refuse to accept the patriarchal society if  it is considering women's role any inferior! We had accepted this model because we wanted a harmonius society based on some rules,,, and for that we had sacrificed many of our birth right. We, willingly, don't claim anything from our birth place, we leave our birth place, we adjust ourselves in a completly new enviornment with strangers, we do our every bit to support your system. But none of them because we are inferior or timid! Its greatness of our heart  which like to give up everything to assure a systematic, civilized society and in return we want a respect and greatfullness in your eyes for us.  We don't like you to treat us like a weaker section as we are strong enough to do anything which can assure our strength in your eyes. I know, the purpose of this day was not to offend our kind. You wanted to recognize our achievements on this day,,,,,but this segregates us from you in a different way. For example- Guests in our houses are always welcomed and respectable but no body wants to be treated like a guest in his/her own house. So your this generosity is a bit uncomfortable for the women of substance. You and me are like two wheels of a bicycle and we,women, like it that way because it does not show any hierarchy. Division of labor should be the part of a harmonious society so we all are playing our parts within our own capabilities. Let's appreciate each other for that and accept the co-existance of each other because that will be the foundation of a healthy society. Cheers! :-)
             

Greed & Jealousy are integral part of human nature! Think tank z on...

             Can't say about infants, but the time since a human being become aware of his surrounding, he consciously or unconsciously feels like acquiring every possible things of his need. Now, what is basic need? i.e. food, shelter and clothes. Looks like very simple? But let me remind you that even some of them were also not the primary need of homo sapience. He use to wander naked here and there in search of food and any suitable, temporary shelter was good enough for him to spend his night. But then he start thinking of stability and after that the luxury. So he increases his needs to a permanent shelter, agricultural lands and clothes which was made up of tree leaves or dead animal's skin. Life was still simple and linear for him but a bit more comfortable now. attainment of relatively more luxury goods, encourages him to think further and further so now even sky is the limit for him! But in this very process, he didn't realise when the hell, a kind of unending greed enters into his life and in case of unfulfillment of the desire, a kind of restlessness was there inside him. & that was his newly discovered jealousy. Jealousy from others who is able to attain his desirable materials. It could have been earlier also in him but it couldn't find the significant reason to come out because there were no significant hierarchy in ancient time and almost everyone has food, shelter and clothes of  almost equal level.

  Where my mind is wandering right now is none of the above. That was mere an introduction with the past. But now what I am thinking is, 'What should be the appropriate limit where we should stop ourselves bothering  much about the materialistic gain?' Because greed is an endless processes and hence jealousy! Both of them are consequence of each others and increase in cascading rates when set free. Result is, 'The personality of that person is pitiable'. See the amount of restlessness in him. He forget the difference of right and wrong, crosses the boundaries of morality and humanity innumerable times and lastly he stop thinking himself as a true human being. He is a machine now with enhanced quality of greed and jealousy. The distorted presence of him is pleasant for none which causes further restlessness because unlike machines, human being wants his respect in the eyes of others regardless of his acts.

  Analyse his condition now. who is better? The primitive less privileged , satisfied man or advanced, materialistic, unsatisfied man? Decision is yours.

Here I am not trying to turn the modern man back into savagery and barbarism but trying to convey the essence that stretch yourself within your limit, Do what satisfy you, Try to quench your thirst at appropriate limit and save your personality from getting distorted. Getting distorted from greed and jealousy. Tame your instinct. Behave like a HUMAN!

Only a self motivated person can achieve the significant goals of life! Think tank z on...

                           
       Otherwise, its a temporary feeling without any significant base and direction i.e. achieving something significant in our life. Basically, every body wants to to something considerable in his/her life...something that can be recognized by the world, something which can be apreciated by the world, something which can quench our thirst of power and position in the world.
Mankind, from the beginning was power loving, he always wants to see himself on the top,,,,but there will be some heavy payment for the same if you are really want to do this. Significant things never come free of cost because, then, it will loose its significant/unique quality. Anything which is common to all, people just don't care about it. He always wants to stand apart from others to look unique and different.
However, in some people its natural and in others, its event generated i.e. when we feel ourselves low in others eyes or our self realization of our low stature in a known crowd. That's the time when we really want to achieve something big which can make us esteemed in a known folk.
Let me tell you, in most of the cases, this event generated ambition is temporary and we forget it as soon as we are again in a comfortable situation. After that, these kind of feelings are very off and on in our life, based on the frequency of such events in our life. The frequency raises when the people of some high stature, are around us because of frequent interaction with them, but, frequency is low when the same kind of people are around you. In this case, occasionally you find such people whom you think that they are better than you by any mean.
  Now, you can't help yourself in case of the feeling is temporary and you want to achieve something only because you want to earn your respect, BUT! Its really permanent when this is a part of your personality, it really make you happy and you are really restless when you are not doing something to achieve the goal of your life. Here, wait for moment to clear your concept,,,,merely thinking and a bit of acting in the right direction, is not assuring you for your goal, sometimes, even a genuine attempts may also make you disappointed! But, what really can create defference is your 'Never say die!'attitude. 

The phase of hibernation! Think tank z on...

                                                                                                                                                                              Hibernation phase! Its difficult for creative people to complete this phase when they want to move towards the goal of their life,,, but,  demand of the time is to keep silence, postpone it for certain period of time, and that's because of your current priorities. Circumstances are not favourable for the cause and it is bound to be the period of silence before the actual storm. This phase use to be difficult for you because its your own realisation, mental conflicts, dilemma and a rebel inside you who is bothering you so much. You want to be a self reliant person, You want to feel worthy, the rebel inside you, knows no boundaries, the selfish, self centred nature of her forcing you to do whatever you want to do with your life but the other more sensible one inside you is stopping you to do anything irrelevant. This one is more charitable, reasonable, understanding,mature,experienced and thoughtful.
The rebel is still a child so she is innocent, straight in her demand, non calculative and freedom loving. Ageing is not an obvious phenomenon for her so she does not take any lesson from the past experiences. She does not know how to follow a rule, her freedom knows no boundaries ! She just want to listen to her heart and no one else!
But, the sensible one,,,,, she has all the experiences of the living world. She is the one who grows old with you, she got affected by the worldly things, she wants to learn a lesson from the past mistakes. She thinks before talking to someone, she is more a believer of once bitten twice shy.
Both of them live inside you but they are not in talking terms, they are much like the North and South pole of earth with all different properties and characters however their home is same and even the earth has to make some equilibrium between its poles to accommodate them properly so that it can retain its balance.
Experiences always matters in the living world and we are living in this world only,,,,,so you need to give a sleeping pill to the rebellious child when she is getting stubborn. She just need to wake up when you are really in a mood of pampering yourself. :-D
Otherwise, discuss with the sensible one, she will fetch some good, meaningful advices.......and while discussing I realise that hibernation can be a retreating phase. You just need to plan your future properly in the available resources  and the restlessness is gone! The truth is, you are no more a child,,,and doesn't matter that the child in side you is not growing old,,,but she bound to die with your own physical end! 

Suffering must not be tolerated for Elders & Kids!